AshleyNerdStar’s Quotes of the Week: Family Guy Edition

For this first installment of “AshleyNerdStar’s Quotes of the Week,” I visit one of my favorite TV shows Family Guy to countdown my top 10 memorable quotes. Now I know there are a lot of quotes that could have been on this list.

Some of these maybe your favs, while others that are not on the list serve as memorable classics. I think these 10 are pretty funny.
#10: Tom Tucker: And now, here’s Ollie Williams, with the BlaccuWeather Forecast. Ollie!
Ollie Williams: IT’S GON’ RAIN!
Tom Tucker: Thanks, Ollie.
#9: Mayor West: I love this job more than I love taffy, and I’m a man who loves his taffy.
#8: Cleveland Brown:  Public urination is just wrong. Except during the Million Man March when protestors burned down our porta-potties and I used my stream of justice to put out the hate.
#7:  Chris Griffin: Yo, did y’all check me when that hottie was all up in my Kool-Aid? Yeah, I was looking to break off a little somethin’ somethin’ but my crew gave me the 411 on that skank and she’s all about the bling-bling.
#6: Dennis Miller:  I don’t want to go on a rant, here, but America’s foreign policy makes about as much sense as Beowulf having sex with Robert Fulton at the first battle of Antietam. I mean when a neo-conservative defenestrates it’s like Raskolnikov filibuster deoxymonohydroxinate…

[Peter is watching this on TV]

Peter Griffin: What the hell does rant mean?

#5: Police Officer: Hey. That’s Against the law. You’re coming with me.

Peter Griffin: [singing to the tune of U Can’t Touch this] Ah ah ah. Can’t Touch Me / Can’t Touch me / Ja ja ja ja just like the bad guy/ from Lethal Weapon 2 / I’ve got diplomatic Immunity / so Hammer, you can’t sue / I can write graffiti even jay-walk in the streets / I can Riot, loot, not give a hoot, and touch your sister’s teat / Can’t touch me/ Can’t touch me.

Mayor: What in God’s name is he doing?

Peter Griffin: Can’t Touch me.

Cleveland Brown: I believe that’s the worm.

Peter Griffin: [still singing] Can’t touch me / STOP, Peter time / I’m a big shot, there’s no doubt / light a fire then pee it out / Don’t like it, kiss my rump / Just for a minute, let’s all do the bump / Can’t touch me / Yeah, do the Peter Griffin Bump / Can’t touch me/ I’m Presidential Peter/ Interns think I’m hot / Don’t care if you’re handicapped, I’ll still park in your spot / I’ve been around the world / from Hartford to Back Bay / It’s Peter, Go Peter, I’m so Peter, Yo Peter, Let’s see Regis rap this way / Can’t touch me.

#4: Stewie Griffin: Damn it! I want pancakes! God! You people understand every language except English. Yo quiero pancakes. Donnez-moi pancakes. Click-click-bloody click pancakes!
#3: UPS Woman: I’ve got a package for Glen Quagmire.

Quagmire: I’ll be right back

[Closes door, then returns a moment later, naked]

Quagmire: And I’ve got a package for you too! Oh!

[she maces him]

Quagmire: Nice try, but I’ve built up an immunity.

#2:  Lois Griffin: You all think Christmas just happens. You think all this goodwill just falls from the freakin’ sky. Well, it doesn’t! It falls out of my holly jolly butt! So you can cook your own damn turkey. Wrap your own damn presents. And hey, while you’re at it, you can all ride a one horse open sleigh to hell!
 And my number one memorable Family Guy quote is… [Drum Roll Please!]
#1: Peter Griffin: [Dancing to Axel F] Neh-neh neh neh neh-neh neh neh. Neh-neh neh neh neh-neh neh. Neh neh neh neh-neh neh and then another neh-neh neh neh-neh.
Share with me some of your favorite Family Guy Quotes below in the comments. 11 seasons and they are still going strong!
Stay Classy, Homies ^_^.

Source: Family Guy Quotes –

The AshNerdStar Report Blog Features

Super Powers

Hey you awesome beautiful people you! Since I am working my butt off making sure to post the best blog posts around for your reading pleasure, I wanted to make a few changes. So I present to you, ladies and gents *Drumroll Please* the new and improved blog feature list for The AshNerdStar Report!


I will be posting interviews featuring some really cool talented people. The interviews will include: musicians, singers, actors/actresses, photographers, comedians, artists, YouTubers, poets, people who are doing awesome things in the community, and more.  I decided to do this because I want to show what they love to do with others so they can check out their stuff. It’s always good to showcase other people’s talents to help inspire others who are pursuing their own dreams.

If you are interested in being interviewed you can email me at, DM me on Twitter @AshleyNerdStar, or message me on The AshNerdStar Report page on Facebook  (

You Know What Grinds My Gears

This is pretty much the only one that I kept from the past blog features list. The idea for this blog feature came from Family Guy.  Remember the episode, “Stewie B. Goode” from season four? Peter was at the LackLuster Video Store looking to score some porn to take home and watch. Then the sales clerk told him that they don’t sell porn in anymore. Peter started giving a rant about how the video store stopped selling porn.  The loveable news anchor from Channel 5 News, Tom Tucker who also was trying to score some porn overheard Peter’s awesome rant. Tom liked it so much that he gave Peter a daily news segment called: “You Know Really Grinds My Gears” where he rants about general things that irritate him.  So I decided to rant about things in the news or in general that really irritate me.  It’s kind of like an opportunity to vent out my frustrations in a healthy manner.

AshNerdStar’s Five Favorite Things

I list the top five things that are my favorite at the moment. It could range from movies, music, clothes, food, sports, quotes, and more. I just want to spread some cool things that I love with you guys.

AshNerdStar’s Quotes of the Week

I share at least five or six quotes that are really dope. Good quotes that make you laugh or think about. I guess you can say that I am a bit of a quote nerd ^_^.

Ask AshNerdStar

This is your opportunity to ask me questions.  They can be questions dealing with advice or in general. You can tweet your question to me @LadyAshNerdStar using the hashtag #AskAshleyNerdStar, send me a message on Tumblr, or through The AshNerdStar Report page on Facebook ( In the event that no one gives me questions to answer, I will just either look for good questions to answer.

So there you have it! This will be the format of the entire blog. Random blog posts will always be posted about things that I am excited to share and write about.  I hope you will enjoy!

Stay Classy, Homies ^_^.

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